Monday, July 11, 2011

My landlord knocked on my door 7.30a today.

Recently I've been confronted with quite a few reminders or the interests I once had as a teenager and how much I've changed since then-- it's been quite astonishing. A recent concert and convention I wasn't able to attend almost made me feel ashamed of the changes. Frankly, I really shouldn't.

People who have known me for years can testify my love of Japanese Rock music. People who have known me for more years than that can testify for my love of Japanese fashion and animation. But people who know me now have yet to even see that side of me... it's downright shocking by comparison! I think I've become more demure and conformist with time and while shocking, it's also amusing. Does anyone I know today really know that I've slept out on the street multiple times in order to get a good spot at a concert? Or that I've organized huge fan get togethers via internet?

People associate me as domesticated (on my own accord and volition) but nothing more. I don't think they'd recognize the me of five or more years ago.

I ain't gunna lie-- when I see a goth kid, I feel a little bit of nostalgia. Not because I was ever goth, but because Of the alternative lifestyle aspect. I know more about the culture than would be expected for someone like me. When confronted with modern fans of the bands I used to love, I'm almost hesitant to bring up my history ("Oh hey! I love that band!")-- just because so much time has passed and I don't look like a fan. It's kind of pathetic. 

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